POTTY TRAINING UPDATE!
Baby, lifestyle
Loads of you asked, so a quick update post 3 day potty training! The method we used: In short: a very intense 3 days of letting accidents happen and…
Do you have potty training in your near future? Curious about the 3 day potty training method? Or maybe you saw the title and didn’t know it was a thing?! I’ve got some essentials for you! We’ve done the three day method twice through now and as we embark on a third I thought I’d give you an overview and everything you need to accomplish it. Along with some organic potty training underwear options I struggled to find.
What is the 3 day method?
It really is just what it says: a tried and tested method for potty training in 3 days. It’s overviewed in a few books but the one I used (and stuck to) was THIS one available as an ebook and audiobook for ease. It’s a short read or listen and you do need to read it first! I’ve had people say the method didn’t work for them… and then admit they didn’t actually read the book! There are some key pieces to the 3 day approach you need to understand and implement, and it’s was about a 1 hour read so not bad.
Depending on the age/child/preference, you can potty train day and night, or just days. We’ve done one child each way using this method. We did what we needed and felt right for the child and season. When we did just days we then waited until they were ready (and we were, I was heavily pregnant and wanted sleep!) It happened quickly later on, cos they were ready.
NOTE: In practice I’d say for us it’s been a 3 day process to have the concept down well at home. 3 days to use the potty all the time and know the system. But it felt more like 3 weeks to us until it was fleshed out in different situations and we feel fully confident out and about. Not that it was 3 weeks of constant accidents, but more 3 days of being 100% focused, then 3 weeks of really thinking about it. Of asking a lot and forming new patterns. But, after 3 days they really do know the system and the full on pressure eases!
Why the 3 day method?
As with anything in raising kids, there are many ways and not one right way! I personally think the choice to use this method really depends on YOUR personality type, and time availability as a parent or caregiver. For me I knew I was going to do far better with an intense 3 days than a long drawn out process. It was clear, and concise and I knew that would make me a better parent – which affects kids.
There might be other versions out there but but both of these books and the way we embraced it didn’t use any shaming. There was nothing in them that veered from our more gentle, authoritative parenting style. It felt very kind, and conducive to the way we talk and work with our kids every day.
Eco Potty options
In my opinion (but one of the books doesn’t share that opinion) you really want a potty for potty training this way, not just to move straight to the big toilet. And if after the 3 days you’ll be on the go a lot, you might want an option that can be taken to go. I just used a simple potty in a tote bag that went with us, but there are also folding contraptions. We also inherited 2 second hand potties but if I was buying new I’d look for a recycled plastic option like these:
The Books I Read
There are a number of different books on the market and I can’t speak to them all. But there are two that we’ve used and followed and had success with. They’re very similar but only one is available on audiobook which is more practical for lots of people. Both give a great overview with exact wording, how to know if/when a child is ready to start, how to trouble shoot, how to prepare. If you’re considering using this method I’d download it a good few months before you’d start (maybe 18months old.) That way you can look at methods and choose the right way for you.
Neither book suggests any shaming, or anything that didn’t pass my assertive but more “gentle”, authoritative, parenting style.
Book 1 with an audiobook option: Written by an education expert with a career in potty training toddlers, this covers every aspect you need from mindset, to common mistakes to language to use. It’s about a 1.5 hours listen on Audible which you can do free with a trial.
Book option 2: The 3 Day Potty Training Book I first used HERE. This was the book that I used for the first two rounds and it gave us everything we needed. It’s a short (an hour if I remember) read and is enough to teach you everything you need. I’d say it’s a slightly more “old school” mindset with a few more absolutes and definitive answers on how to do it, and with a lower bar on readiness. But I include both books because I used both and they both gave us everything we needed.
Ethical + Organic Potty training Underwear
There are SO many more options for organic potty training underwear than there were when I started! When I say potty training underwear I don’t go in for thicker or water resistant. Just regular underwear but small! It can be harder to find when you’re potty training pre 2 years! I really want organic when it comes to clothes and especially underwear. It’s close to the skin 24/7 so I want breathable and the safest possible. The chemicals used in cotton production and clothing manufacturing have an impact. On the planet, on the farmers and workers, and on our bodies. So especially with something worn on that sensitive skin all the time, I want to choose natural fibre and organic. 7 years ago I put in hours of research and there was barely anything but there are thankfully more options now. You’ll need about 12 sets I’d say, if you can wash every day. And more if you can’t.
- Frugi: (free shipping US/EU/Canada) A beautiful B corporation, ethical, organic cotton option. These are the ones we have for Isla are second hand but Frugi. Find them HERE.
- Maxomorra: (great UK option) A GOTS certified Swedish brand. Probably the ones I’ve found to hold up best and repair most successfully. With really fun animal, food, vehicle designs done in modern ways. Find them HERE.
- Boden: (worldwide delivery) A brand I love for traceably produced kids clothes. They’re not usually organic, but often have a larger range than some other brands.
- Jojo Maman Bebe: Like Boden, not usually organic but often a bigger easy to shop option. Jojo has a more “traditional” style and is more gender stereotyped but it’s another B corp, ethical option.
- PACT Organic Clothing At the time of writing PACT don’t have any underwear but it’s the only organic brand I found when Clayton was a baby. It’s still a favourite for organic clothing and we have bought more underwear since that we love – it comes and goes so it’s worth checking. You can get 20% off with THIS link.
And don’t forget to look second hand! I feel great buying second hand underwear and giving it a hot wash. I know it’s not everyone’s thing though so then I’d just recommend organic and ethical if you can!
Treats
You need these! The first time round I tried with stickers and small toys. Nope. Just go for sugar – i promise it works best. I have a small jar of chocolate chunks and coloured sugar coated chocolates on the counter very visible so we can talk about them constantly! A great UK option for ethical, palm oil free fun coloured chocolate drops.
Conclusion: Other thoughts from doing this 2/3 times!
I only have my experiences to go by and there’s a much wider variety out there than my children. But all the resources say that if you and your child are ready, and you follow the material, it’s a very successful method. I’ve held on to that for dear life especially during day one each time. I felt like it was all going to fail for those first days all three times. So read the book, and know that you’re REALLY going to have to stick to your guns.
My short conclusion would be: very intense, very worth it. The reward in return for the work is HIGH. After the 3 days it feels so incredible to have done this thing together and mostly have it behind you! No long periods of being in the potty training zone. No long ambiguous seasons. It’s clear, and defined and short and for me that’s so worth it. and for me the same goes for doing it early. I think there are pros and cons with waiting and for me each time doing it early won out as a better fit. So assess your personality type. If intensity and concentrating 100% of the time doesn’t sound possible, or if you’d rather do something less intense for a lot longer and you have the life and bandwidth to do that… maybe look at a different method!
Prep life ahead: You really are going to watch a child’s lower half from wake up to sleep time. For three days straight. So prep life ahead. I thought I wouldn’t need to have food and household tasks prepped ahead and that was my biggest mistake the first time around. Do the work ahead. Plan to order takeout, make meals ahead, be ok eating toast and fruit. Whatever it is have a plan for simple food. Even if you get to hand off to someone else for an hour, you likely won’t want to cook!
If you’re likely to get bored, and you can still concentrate on your child while listening you might put in one earbud. I find when I’m a bit bored my concentration can wander and I’m not waiting and watching the kid. Especially when I’m alone. So for me, adding an earbud with an audiobook or podcast for sessions has really helped me focus in on my potty training kid.
Other kids: I’ve done this pregnant with a back injury, with a 3 year old, and now with a 3 and 5 year old. There will likely always be other factors that make it harder. If you have any help, use it on the other kids. It’s easier for the potty training focus to be with one person. It’s worth prepping the other kids an getting them on board – we went for the ‘whenever she gets a chocolate, you get a chocolate’ approach and it worked well!
If you choose to do it, good luck! It’s been a really rewarding experience for our family.
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